FAUNA  CEOs
FAUNA Corp · Internal Records REF: FC-INT-2026-099 · CLASSIFICATION: STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL · DISTRIBUTED TO ALL STAFF (UNAVOIDABLY)
The Board

FAUNA Corp
Internal Records

Everything herein is accurate, regrettable, and already known.

Leadership & The Org

EMP-100037

Deborah W. Pemberton

Hammer-headed Fruit Bat

Chief Executive Officer

"It honks once per quarter. The honk is the strategy."

C-Suite

EMP-100074

Cecil S. Maplewhite

Nudibranch

Chief Brand Palette Officer

EMP-100111

Beatrice I. Goodenough Sr.

Indri

Chief Internal Comms Officer

EMP-100148

Gertrude O. Ramsbottom

Olm

Chief Deep Archives Officer

EMP-100185

Montague B. Twistleton

Handfish

Chief Hands-on Management Officer

EMP-100222

Susan E. Fairfax

Pink Fairy Armadillo

Chief Executive Protection Officer

EMP-100259

Mortimer J. Goodenough CFA

Babirusa

Chief Self-Assessment Officer

EMP-100296

Trevor I. Twistleton II

Magnificent Frigatebird

Chief Self-Promotion Officer

EMP-100333

Pamela I. Quayle Sr.

Oarfish

Chief Doomsaying Officer

EMP-100370

Gary K. Lattimer

Goliath Frog

Chief Heavy Lifting Officer

EMP-100407

Deborah F. Fairfax

Gharial

Chief Procurement Officer

Vice Presidents

Millicent T. Ellsworth Giant Isopod VP of Cost Reduction
Horace J. Throckmorton Lungless Salamander VP of Fresh Air
Derek A. Snell IV Camel Spider VP of Rumours
Susan S. Ashworth CFA Great Potoo VP of Surveillance
Greg S. Sidebottom Portuguese Man o' War VP of Joint Ventures
Archibald M. Caldwell Weasel VP of Accounts
Montague I. Cholmondeley Newt VP of Analysis
Vivian V. Ellsworth Lionfish VP of Market Expansion
Sandra K. Pickering Colugo VP of Transformation
Eustace E. Thornbury Weasel VP of Accounts

Seniority Pyramid

Sample Reporting Lines

  1. Janet I. Throckmorton Possum · Intern of Crisis Management reports to Cecil E. Sidebottom Possum · Analyst of Crisis Management
  2. Philippa E. Pennington Goose · Intern of Enforcement reports to Lavinia R. Ashworth Goose · Analyst of Enforcement
  3. Gertrude N. Lattimer III Portuguese Man o' War · Director of Joint Ventures reports to Greg S. Sidebottom Portuguese Man o' War · VP of Joint Ventures
  4. Gerald S. Throckmorton Esq. Axolotl · Intern of Talent Retention reports to Malcolm P. Quayle Jellyfish · Analyst of Governance
  5. Deborah S. Twistleton Numbat · Director of Pest Control reports to Keith J. Ramsbottom Numbat · VP of Pest Control
  6. Millicent B. Bumble Pigeon · Intern of Synergy reports to Gerald W. Pennington Giant Centipede · Analyst of Multitasking
  7. Millicent F. Ashworth Rat · Intern of Cost Optimization reports to Florence V. Throckmorton Rat · Analyst of Cost Optimization
  8. Vivian H. Twistleton Slow Loris · Analyst of Cybersecurity reports to Nigel G. Higginbotham Slow Loris · Manager of Cybersecurity
  9. Clarence F. Smethwick Frog · Intern of Liquidity reports to Vivian O. Grimsby Jr. Chihuahua · Analyst of Sales
  10. Carol G. Sidebottom Goose · Intern of Enforcement reports to Lavinia R. Ashworth Goose · Analyst of Enforcement
  11. Janet M. Thornbury Border Terrier · Analyst of Pest Control reports to Agnes N. Harrington Barreleye · Manager of Foresight
  12. Sylvester L. Frobisher Frilled Lizard · Analyst of Crisis Comms reports to Tobias L. Thornbury Chameleon · Manager of Public Relations

Executive Assistants

Does the job. Gets the blame.

  • Clarence V. Higginbotham (Pigeon) Assistant to Egbert G. Pemberton (Newt, VP of Analysis)
  • Carol H. Ramsbottom (Chameleon) Assistant to Tobias K. Lattimer (Pangolin, VP of Data Protection)
  • Cecil M. Wetherby (Frog) Assistant to Percival K. Pumphrey IV (Andean Condor, VP of Executive Search)
  • Greg T. Higginbotham (Frog) Assistant to Mortimer J. Goodenough CFA (Babirusa, Chief Self-Assessment Officer)
  • Winston H. Pratt (Archerfish) Assistant to Lavinia V. Featherstone (Camel Spider, VP of Rumours)
  • Neil S. Throckmorton (Pigeon) Assistant to Beatrix O. Whitmore (Gharial, VP of Procurement)
  • Janet K. Postlethwaite (Goblin Shark) Assistant to Edwina K. Cholmondeley (Giant Clam, VP of Holdings)
  • Lavinia R. Ashworth (Goose) Assistant to Rupert V. Ashworth (Goliath Frog, VP of Heavy Lifting)
  • Ignatius B. Vexley (Capybara) Assistant to Deborah W. Pemberton (Hammer-headed Fruit Bat, Chief Executive Officer)
  • Sylvester F. Pratt (Hedgehog) Assistant to Montague B. Twistleton (Handfish, Chief Hands-on Management Officer)

Office Dramas

Affairs

  • Gerald P. Wetherby (Peacock Spider, Analyst of Pitch Decks) transferred departments three weeks after being seen sharing a single umbrella with Horace S. Pemberton Esq. (Saiga Antelope, Analyst of Air Quality) in the fire escape.

  • Janet M. Thornbury (Border Terrier, Analyst of Pest Control) and Rosalind A. Ashworth (Goblin Shark, Analyst of Sudden Restructuring) were caught 'rehearsing a presentation' in the print room. There was no presentation.

  • Carol E. Pratt (Frilled Lizard, Intern of Crisis Comms) transferred departments three weeks after being seen sharing a single ergonomic chair with Quentin J. Blackwood (Hamster, Intern of Operations) in the break room.

  • It is universally understood that Philippa H. Dankworth (Peacock, Manager of Personal Brand) and Barry W. Harrington (Okapi, Analyst of Stealth Mode) are 'just colleagues.' They arrive separately. They leave together. IT has the badge logs. IT says nothing.

  • Florence P. Smethwick (Hamster, Intern of Operations) and Ursula I. Smethwick (Kakapo, Analyst of Heritage) have been 'aligning on deliverables' in the fire escape every evening this quarter. Nobody is fooled. Everybody is impressed by the commitment.

  • Pamela J. Postlethwaite (Electric Eel, Manager of Performance Reviews) transferred departments three weeks after being seen sharing a single ergonomic chair with Beatrice L. Whitmore Sr. (Pigeon, Intern of Synergy) in the supply closet.

  • It is universally understood that Rosalind S. Fitzgerald (Cat, Intern of Strategy) and Trevor V. Pratt III (Rat, Intern of Cost Optimization) are 'just colleagues.' They arrive separately. They leave together. IT has the badge logs. IT says nothing.

  • Ferdinand K. Ellsworth (Cat, Intern of Strategy) and Carol V. Cholmondeley Esq. (Coconut Crab, Director of Procurement) deny everything. Their calendars are, mysteriously, identical.

  • It is universally understood that Archibald B. Fitzgerald (Hamster, Intern of Operations) and Cornelius N. Bottomley (King Vulture, Manager of Asset Recovery) are 'just colleagues.' They arrive separately. They leave together. IT has the badge logs. IT says nothing.

  • It is universally understood that Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye, Director of Special Projects) and Malcolm M. Vexley IV (Red Panda, Analyst of Customer Delight) are 'just colleagues.' They arrive separately. They leave together. IT has the badge logs. IT says nothing.

  • It is universally understood that Edwina E. Pratt Jr. (Rat, Intern of Cost Optimization) and Dorothea R. Bottomley (Atlas Moth, Director of Optics) are 'just colleagues.' They arrive separately. They leave together. IT has the badge logs. IT says nothing.

  • Agnes V. Throckmorton IV (Raccoon, Intern of Procurement) and Rupert V. Ashworth (Goliath Frog, VP of Heavy Lifting) deny everything. Their calendars are, mysteriously, identical.

  • Lavinia A. Hargreaves (Platypus, Analyst of Compliance) and Sandra K. Pickering (Colugo, VP of Transformation) deny everything. Their calendars are, mysteriously, identical.

  • Deborah J. Bumble (Shoebill, Director of Enforcement) and Montague B. Maplewhite IV (Hamster, Intern of Operations) have been 'aligning on deliverables' in the fire escape every evening this quarter. Nobody is fooled. Everybody is impressed by the commitment.

Feuds & Cold Wars

  • There is a cold war between Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye) and Edwina A. Bumble (Capybara). It began over a stolen yoghurt and has since escalated to a formal turf war over the fourth-floor plant.

  • Ignatius N. Wadsworth (Raccoon) and Gertrude H. Montgomery (Cat) were assigned to the same project. The project is now two projects.

  • There is a cold war between Josephine B. Lattimer (Satanic Leaf-tailed Gecko) and Horace D. Dankworth (Frogfish). It began over a contested Post-it note and has since escalated to a formal turf war over the fourth-floor plant.

  • Linda M. Ashworth (Toucan) and Janet E. Snell (Cat) have not spoken since the Reply-All Catastrophe of last March. Both claim the parking space by the door. Neither will use the lift while the other is in the building.

  • Prudence G. Wadsworth (Capercaillie) and Philippa P. Pennington (Crow) were assigned to the same project. The project is now two projects.

  • Janet M. Thornbury (Border Terrier) and Cornelius B. Featherstone (Feather Star) have not spoken since the Reply-All Catastrophe of last March. Both claim the good stapler. Neither will use the shared kitchen while the other is in the building.

  • Florence P. Twistleton Sr. (Tawny Frogmouth) and Cecil S. Ramsbottom (Greater Roadrunner) were assigned to the same project. The project is now two projects.

  • Gertrude P. Caldwell (Sage Grouse) and Godfrey F. Ramsbottom II (Kinkajou) have not spoken since the Hot-Desking Tragedy. Both claim the window seat. Neither will use the shared kitchen while the other is in the building.

  • Dorothea L. Ashworth (Helmeted Guineafowl) and Susan C. Fairfax Sr. (Kiwi) were assigned to the same project. The project is now two projects.

  • There is a cold war between Prudence I. Ellsworth (Naked Mole-Rat) and Rosalind A. Ashworth (Goblin Shark). It began over an unflushed metaphor and has since escalated to a formal turf war over the fourth-floor plant.

  • Humphrey J. Vexley IV (Darwin's Frog) blind-copies their manager on every email to Philippa F. Caldwell (Crown-of-thorns Starfish). Philippa F. Caldwell (Crown-of-thorns Starfish) has started printing them out and filing them under 'Evidence'.

  • Sharon I. Wetherby (Chihuahua) blind-copies their manager on every email to Theodora B. Wadsworth (Hamster). Theodora B. Wadsworth (Hamster) has started printing them out and filing them under 'Evidence'.

  • Lavinia B. Pemberton CFA (Praying Mantis) and Sylvester W. Pickering (Giraffe) were assigned to the same project. The project is now two projects.

  • There is a cold war between Millicent L. Wadsworth (Red Panda) and Reginald A. Crabtree IV (Gerenuk). It began over a passive-aggressive calendar invite and has since escalated to communicating exclusively via the shared spreadsheet.

Mentorships

  • Derek H. Sidebottom (Saiga Antelope) was assigned to Mortimer E. Fairfax (Andean Condor) for 'development.' Derek H. Sidebottom (Saiga Antelope) now also does Mortimer E. Fairfax (Andean Condor)'s expenses, Mortimer E. Fairfax (Andean Condor)'s calendar, and Mortimer E. Fairfax (Andean Condor)'s breathing exercises.

  • Agnes L. Pennington (Mimic Octopus) is mentoring Karen S. Ashworth IV (Hamster). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Karen S. Ashworth IV (Hamster) watching Agnes L. Pennington (Mimic Octopus) ignore emails with total serenity.

  • Greg L. Throckmorton CFA (Star-nosed Mole) took Bartholomew T. Blackwood III (Toad) under their wing. Bartholomew T. Blackwood III (Toad) has not been seen in natural light since.

  • Ignatius D. Frobisher (Hoatzin) was assigned to Josephine D. Sidebottom (Pangolin) for 'development.' Ignatius D. Frobisher (Hoatzin) now also does Josephine D. Sidebottom (Pangolin)'s expenses, Josephine D. Sidebottom (Pangolin)'s calendar, and Josephine D. Sidebottom (Pangolin)'s breathing exercises.

  • Ursula K. Twistleton (Hammerhead Shark) is mentoring Horace C. Pemberton (Flamingo). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Horace C. Pemberton (Flamingo) watching Ursula K. Twistleton (Hammerhead Shark) ignore emails with total serenity.

  • Barry O. Pratt (Japanese Spider Crab) is mentoring Cuthbert E. Cholmondeley Esq. (Possum). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Cuthbert E. Cholmondeley Esq. (Possum) watching Barry O. Pratt (Japanese Spider Crab) ignore emails with total serenity.

  • Brenda V. Pickering Jr. (Resplendent Quetzal) is mentoring Percival P. Fairfax (Giraffe). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Percival P. Fairfax (Giraffe) watching Brenda V. Pickering Jr. (Resplendent Quetzal) ignore emails with total serenity.

  • Millicent S. Smethwick (Gila Monster) was assigned to Godfrey M. Smethwick (Lungless Salamander) for 'development.' Millicent S. Smethwick (Gila Monster) now also does Godfrey M. Smethwick (Lungless Salamander)'s expenses, Godfrey M. Smethwick (Lungless Salamander)'s calendar, and Godfrey M. Smethwick (Lungless Salamander)'s breathing exercises.

  • Leopold N. Wetherby (Gecko) was assigned to Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye) for 'development.' Leopold N. Wetherby (Gecko) now also does Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye)'s expenses, Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye)'s calendar, and Cuthbert J. Harrington Sr. (Aye-aye)'s breathing exercises.

  • Sylvester E. Grimsby (Hammerhead Shark) took Edwina A. Goodenough (Capybara) under their wing. Edwina A. Goodenough (Capybara) has not been seen in natural light since.

  • Greg N. Snell (Fossa) is mentoring Gwendolyn P. Wadsworth IV (Axolotl). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Gwendolyn P. Wadsworth IV (Axolotl) watching Greg N. Snell (Fossa) ignore emails with total serenity.

  • Mortimer J. Ashworth (Peacock) is mentoring Dave S. Frobisher (Sage Grouse). So far the mentorship consists entirely of Dave S. Frobisher (Sage Grouse) watching Mortimer J. Ashworth (Peacock) ignore emails with total serenity.

The Watercooler

Unverified. Unretracted. Unignorable.

Word is Agnes G. Wadsworth (Bat) made Manager of Night Operations purely by never replying-all.

Someone saw Sylvester R. Sidebottom (Tufted Deer) eating a competitor's lunch in the underground car park. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

They're saying Karen D. Fairfax III (Frilled Lizard) is the reason the Reply-All Catastrophe of last March happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Rupert K. Throckmorton (Aardvark) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the fire escape.

Heard at the watercooler: Pamela K. Thornbury (Pigeon) hasn't done any actual work since onboarding, and honestly, the whole floor respects it.

Someone saw Bartholomew A. Sidebottom Esq. (Tufted Deer) holding a meeting with no attendees in the disabled toilet on Floor 4. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Someone saw Cecil N. Montgomery III (Capybara) photocopying something that was not paper in the break room. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Rupert R. Pickering (Sturgeon) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the server room.

Someone saw Sharon M. Maplewhite (Slow Loris) photocopying something that was not paper in the east stairwell. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

They're saying Beatrice S. Snell III (Giant Centipede) is the reason the Stapler Incident happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Someone saw Vivian K. Ramsbottom (Tuatara) holding a meeting with no attendees in the underground car park. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Heard at the watercooler: Archibald S. Sidebottom (Darwin's Frog) hasn't done any actual work since the rebrand, and honestly, the whole floor respects it.

They're saying Mavis K. Montgomery III (Capybara) is the reason the Lanyard Mandate happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Derek R. Thornbury (Crown-of-thorns Starfish) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the third-floor kitchenette.

Word is Janet I. Throckmorton (Possum) made Intern of Crisis Management purely by outlasting everyone.

Nobody is sure what Agnes V. Bottomley (Crown-of-thorns Starfish) actually does. Agnes V. Bottomley (Crown-of-thorns Starfish) prefers it that way.

Nobody is sure what Vivian O. Thornbury (Rat) actually does. Vivian O. Thornbury (Rat) prefers it that way.

Nobody is sure what Agnes T. Pratt (Sloth) actually does. Agnes T. Pratt (Sloth) prefers it that way.

They're saying Pamela P. Pennington (Caecilian) is the reason the Reply-All Catastrophe of last March happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Word is Hortense V. Ramsbottom (Armadillo Girdled Lizard) made Analyst of Risk Containment purely by outlasting everyone.

Word is Cuthbert S. Fairfax (Armadillo Girdled Lizard) made Analyst of Risk Containment purely by being slightly too calm to fire.

Nobody is sure what Ignatius D. Frobisher (Hoatzin) actually does. Ignatius D. Frobisher (Hoatzin) prefers it that way.

Theodora H. Throckmorton III (Frog) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the third-floor kitchenette.

They're saying Mavis T. Cholmondeley (Octopus) is the reason the Lanyard Mandate happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Rupert I. Ashworth Esq. (Surinam Toad) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the break room.

They're saying Godfrey F. Ramsbottom II (Kinkajou) is the reason the Great Fridge Purge happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Nobody is sure what Ferdinand N. Snell Sr. (Capybara) actually does. Ferdinand N. Snell Sr. (Capybara) prefers it that way.

Someone saw Octavia F. Montgomery (Archerfish) negotiating with the vending machine in Meeting Room 3. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Someone saw Eustace C. Bumble (Axolotl) asleep at the desk with eyes open in the smoking area. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Heard at the watercooler: Ursula B. Cholmondeley (Mantis Shrimp) hasn't done any actual work since a vague point in 2019, and honestly, the whole floor respects it.

Nobody is sure what Dave R. Cholmondeley (Yeti Crab) actually does. Dave R. Cholmondeley (Yeti Crab) prefers it that way.

Derek C. Blackwood (Border Terrier) has been 'working from home' for six weeks. The home address on file is, allegedly, the fire escape.

Heard at the watercooler: Gertrude T. Crabtree (Cuttlefish) hasn't done any actual work since before the pandemic, and honestly, the whole floor respects it.

They're saying Edwina F. Harrington CFA (Christmas Tree Worm) is the reason the Stapler Incident happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Heard at the watercooler: Millicent W. Postlethwaite (Whip Spider) hasn't done any actual work since before the pandemic, and honestly, the whole floor respects it.

Word is Rupert M. Quayle (Zebra) made Manager of Risk purely by standing near the right people.

They're saying Dave D. Quayle (Ocean Sunfish) is the reason the Lanyard Mandate happened, and the silence on the matter is deafening.

Nobody is sure what Quentin J. Blackwood (Hamster) actually does. Quentin J. Blackwood (Hamster) prefers it that way.

Someone saw Sylvester H. Postlethwaite Sr. (Giant Weta) photocopying something that was not paper in the server room. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Word is Agnes K. Dankworth (Japanese Spider Crab) made Director of Long Reach purely by knowing where a body is buried (metaphorically) (probably).

Someone saw Greg N. Snell (Fossa) eating a competitor's lunch in the east stairwell. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

Someone saw Brenda O. Vexley (Quokka) asleep at the desk with eyes open in the supply closet. This has not been confirmed. This has not been denied.

HR Complaints Board

Note from HR The board is for awareness, not resolution. HR reminds you that resolutions are handled separately and have not, as yet, been forthcoming.

#0447 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Beatrice W. Worthington (Southern Ground Hornbill) vs Neil A. Hargreaves Esq. (Raccoon)

Re: leaving the desk damp

#0448 open; HR has filed its own complaint about the complaint

Janet M. Frobisher (Maned Wolf) vs Humphrey P. Crabtree CFA (Okapi)

Re: 'an atmosphere'

#0449 escalated, then de-escalated, then forgotten

Ursula I. Smethwick (Kakapo) vs Deborah S. Twistleton (Numbat)

Re: excessive honking in shared spaces

#0450 resolved (both parties now ignore each other professionally)

Barry T. Pickering (Cone Snail) vs Ignatius G. Pickering (Alligator Snapping Turtle)

Re: 'tone'

#0451 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Mortimer A. Pennington (Capercaillie) vs Keith T. Pumphrey IV (Rat)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0452 escalated, then de-escalated, then forgotten

Egbert M. Ramsbottom Jr. (Alpaca) vs Brian G. Ellsworth (Pug)

Re: excessive honking in shared spaces

#0453 escalated, then de-escalated, then forgotten

Susan W. Whitmore (Blue Dragon) vs Gary D. Wormwood (Raccoon Dog)

Re: 'staring without blinking'

#0454 closed; everyone was promoted instead

Vivian W. Bumble (Ferret) vs Godfrey E. Dankworth Esq. (Coconut Crab)

Re: 'an atmosphere'

#0455 resolved (both parties now ignore each other professionally)

Millicent B. Montgomery Sr. (Rat) vs Horace C. Pemberton (Flamingo)

Re: humming during the all-hands

#0456 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Greg H. Wormwood (Giant Clam) vs Godfrey K. Goodenough III (Red Panda)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0457 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Dave I. Postlethwaite (Raccoon) vs Neil W. Pennington (Tuatara)

Re: humming during the all-hands

#0458 under review since Q1

Philippa O. Vexley (Blobfish) vs Gwendolyn P. Wadsworth IV (Axolotl)

Re: territorial behaviour around the kettle

#0459 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Mortimer J. Goodenough CFA (Babirusa) vs Janet S. Goodenough Esq. (Box Jellyfish)

Re: 'an atmosphere'

#0460 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Gerald E. Vexley (Gila Monster) vs Ignatius F. Wadsworth (Cat)

Re: passive-aggressive calendar invites

#0461 resolved (both parties now ignore each other professionally)

Wilhelmina R. Pumphrey (Pigeon) vs Keith W. Ramsbottom CFA (Frog)

Re: territorial behaviour around the kettle

#0462 under review since Q1

Malcolm P. Quayle (Jellyfish) vs Mavis D. Wormwood (Tuatara)

Re: humming during the all-hands

#0463 open; HR has filed its own complaint about the complaint

Clarence O. Frobisher (Fennec) vs Beatrix M. Maplewhite (Mandrill)

Re: 'aggressive calmness'

#0464 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Dorothea H. Pemberton (Goose) vs Humphrey L. Wormwood (Tokay Gecko)

Re: 'tone'

#0465 open; HR has filed its own complaint about the complaint

Quentin J. Blackwood (Hamster) vs Reginald I. Harrington (Hoopoe)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0466 closed; everyone was promoted instead

Millicent O. Throckmorton Esq. (Toucan) vs Reginald A. Grimsby CFA (Pigeon)

Re: reply-all enthusiasm

#0467 open; HR has filed its own complaint about the complaint

Brian R. Vexley Esq. (Mantis Shrimp) vs Theodora G. Higginbotham (Frilled Lizard)

Re: humming during the all-hands

#0468 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Dave J. Montgomery (Sloth) vs Rupert K. Twistleton Jr. (Sloth)

Re: 'aggressive calmness'

#0469 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Trevor B. Harrington II (Blue-footed Booby) vs Humphrey S. Smethwick (Ocean Sunfish)

Re: 'tone'

#0470 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Ignatius L. Blackwood (Basilisk Lizard) vs Archibald M. Caldwell (Weasel)

Re: passive-aggressive calendar invites

#0471 under review since Q1

Janet M. Thornbury (Border Terrier) vs Malcolm M. Postlethwaite (Tortoise)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0472 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Sylvester L. Frobisher (Frilled Lizard) vs Percival V. Snell (Raccoon Dog)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0473 pending — HR is also afraid of the respondent

Trevor I. Twistleton II (Magnificent Frigatebird) vs Dave P. Fairfax (Capybara)

Re: passive-aggressive calendar invites

#0474 under review since Q1

Pamela O. Maplewhite (Frog) vs Percival K. Whitmore (Superb Lyrebird)

Re: 'aggressive calmness'

#0475 open; HR has filed its own complaint about the complaint

Gerald E. Lattimer (Walrus) vs Keith J. Ramsbottom (Numbat)

Re: excessive honking in shared spaces

#0476 under review since Q1

Ursula D. Throckmorton (Seahorse) vs Ignatius A. Pratt IV (Scarlet Macaw)

Re: 'staring without blinking'

#0477 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Brenda H. Featherstone (Crow) vs Derek A. Throckmorton (Christmas Tree Worm)

Re: hoarding pens

#0478 withdrawn after the respondent stood near the desk for an hour

Susan M. Bumble III (Matamata Turtle) vs Derek C. Blackwood (Border Terrier)

Re: 'tone'

#0479 escalated, then de-escalated, then forgotten

Reginald M. Pratt (Tenrec) vs Carol P. Featherstone CFA (Gecko)

Re: monopolising the good stapler

#0480 under review since Q1

Quentin R. Smethwick (Giraffe) vs Mortimer V. Ellsworth (Archerfish)

Re: territorial behaviour around the kettle

#0481 under review since Q1

Deborah L. Montgomery (Toucan) vs Sylvester P. Grimsby Sr. (Snow Fox)

Re: hoarding pens

#0482 closed; everyone was promoted instead

Janet O. Ellsworth (Jack Russell Terrier) vs Janet O. Pemberton (Toucan)

Re: 'tone'

END OF INTERNAL RECORD · FAUNA Corp · FILED MMXXVI · STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL