The Board of Directors · Est. during a meeting that ran long
Animal-headed executives promoted beyond reason. Serious suits, deeply unserious heads. The boardroom is feral. On #Hedera 🐾
The Concept
A normal body. A serious suit. A deeply unserious head. Every executive on the Board was promoted beyond reason — which remains the company’s only known HR policy.
The Pyramid
The Board is a strict meritocracy in which merit is determined by how unlikely you are to exist. The rarer the creature, the higher it rises — a system every HR consultant has described as “legally fascinating.”
From the Company History
The Board was not founded. The Board convened, and simply never adjourned. Somewhere around the third agenda item (“Synergy: Are We?”), the humans quietly left to get coffee and were, organisationally speaking, never seen again. By 5:00 p.m. the org chart had quietly rearranged itself. By 5:01 p.m. it was load-bearing.
Periodically a senior exec gestures at the room and asks the great question: “How do we pump the floor?” Two executives offer safe non-answers. Then a junior raises one finger and says the one true thing: “Make good art.” There is a silence. And the Capybara exits, briefly, through the third-floor window. It lands fine. It always lands fine.
On Hedera
The Board chose to incorporate on Hedera for reasons it described as “governance, finality, and a council we respect more than our own.” The truth is simpler: a network of inscrutable creatures reaching consensus very fast, no single one in charge despite all believing they are. They felt seen. They minted. They scheduled a follow-up.
