The Company
Annual Report
Fiscal Year MMXXVI. Prepared by the Office of Self-Assessment. Unaudited, in the sense that no one was brave enough.
Headcount
1000 executives, arranged into the customary pyramid. Promotion is rare; demotion, rarer; departure, theoretical.
CEO 10.1%
C-Suite 101.0%
VP 404.0%
Director 10010.0%
Manager 25025.0%
Analyst 30030.0%
Intern 29929.9%
Organisational Structure
7Layers, CEO to intern
2.22Average reports per manager
7Longest chain of command
162Departments, many redundant
Headcount by Division
Executive Trappings
Status accessories, and where they accumulate.
- Monocle 28 company-wide (2.8%). Peaks among C-Suite at 20%.
- Crown 32 company-wide (3.2%). Peaks among C-Suite at 10%.
- Cigar 52 company-wide (5.2%). Peaks among VP at 8%.
- Charcoal Pinstripe 116 company-wide (11.6%). Peaks among Director at 15%.